My Trial by Fire.

Shit happens. That's the "general rule of the universe". That's why we all here , and that's why i'm writing this now.

Because. Shit. Happens.

It's kinda sad to think this way but it's important that we understand this rule. If you do , it'll make your life 525,600 better.

Over the last couple of weeks i have taken my good time to meditate on some stuff. My life , my family , my friends , my carreer , my hopes , my expectations , etc. Pretty much everything.

What can i say? , i suffer from the "Too-much-thinking" disease. I'm a phychologist by blood , and a phylosopher by soul. At this point in life , i'm not even sure i will ever be able to cure myself.

I have , however, found some ways to tune it down a lot. Thanks to that , i would like to think i'm more calm and in control of my mind. Hopefully T_T . Maybe because of this , and some past events , i started to notice some weird stuff...

Somethings have changed this year , or maybe they started changing a long time ago and i didn't even notice. What seemed great , just a couple of months ago , now seems dull... what seemed dull , now seems more interesting. It's not like that with everything , but i don't feel like myself anymore. Or should i say "I don't feel like the person i thought i was" . Existencial crisis much? , who knows.... doesn't feel like anything i have experienced.

Yeeeah =/

The things that i saw myself doing in 10 years , are not so clear anymore. And slowly , i have come to the realization that the once wide road we all had when we left school , is now narrowing .

For better or worse , i'm not sure of any of the following things : what i want to be , who i want to be. "I don't feel like myself" would be an understatement. Its like i just woke up from a very ,very long dream. And you know what the funny thing is? .... i'm not worried at all. I'm completely indifferent about what's to come. I just wanna tag along for the ride.

Heh , maybe this are only the first symptoms of dementia (oh there's a history of dementia in my family... yep) , who knows (NOT ME) .

I'm not particulary happy with everything. Specially some stuff , but i have tried my best to accept it and move on. After all , what's the most important rule of the universe? (HINT: It comes from the ass)

And on that same note... i have asked the GITR to conduct some final researchs ..Let's see what they came up with!

GITR

Long term effects of studying medicine.


1- Increased tolerance for Caffeine

The GITR research indicates that the longer a person studies medicine , the higher their tolerance for caffeine will be . Different tables were gathered. The 4th year students had a significantly higher resistance when compared to the 3rd and 2nd year students. To verify that this effect wasn't exclusive to medicine , a senior group of "Hotel management" were compared to the 2nd year med students. The 2nd year med students had 5 times the caffeine resistance than the Hotel management seniors .

2- Sleep depravation

The study indicates that the average 1st year med student sleeps for 8 hours ... while the senior med student sleeps for 5.... when he does get to sleep (Not every night , nope)

3- Weight gain

A research was conducted on the diet of senior med students. The results are the following : Macdonald's 20% , Wendy's 20% , TacoBell 20% , No-food-at-all 10% , Other 30%.
In conclusion: Studying medicine gets you fat .

4- Uglyfication

Yes , studying medicine gets you ugly. The uglyfication increases over time. The 1st year students were all clean , used fancy clothes , didn't look like they hadn't seen a razor since their bar mitzvah or like they owed money to their hair stylist and couldn't pay. The seniors did.



And finally

5- Stupidification

While the GITR couldn't prove this , the theory is solid.

1st year students - "You are studying medicine. You are clueless"

2nd year students - "You are still studying medicine . You are stupid?"

3rd year students - "You are stupid!"

5th year students - "LOL you are finishing medicine.... only 5 to 10 more years to go! . Stupid"

As proved by this flawless analysis , medicine students do get more stupid. Those who change to careers , are obviously immune to the "stupidification" .

End research


Sooo , sorry for the lame post. Thank you for reading (you didn't have anything else to do , huh?) . Only 3 more finals to go and then its....... VACATION TIME! . Can't wait for it .. T___T . So freaking deserve it.

Thinking back , everything seems so different now...

Goodbye folks, best of luck and take care.

Pd: just fried another powersupply. Durrrf.

The silent storm.

Not much time to post. Today I have a big test , I think its easy , I'm not really worried. Probably gonna ace it. Hopefully .

Just saw something incredibly sad/bad. The patient doesn't know it yet how bad it is. A 15 , probably less kid , came alone to the office I'm in , at the national onchology institute. Yep , his parent was somewhere else , don't know where.
The kid gave the doctor his latest lab results and told him to go to the examination room. The doc looked at us and gave us the "guillotine" sign.

Turns out the kid has a conjuctival melanoma. Signs? , a small black spot in the eye. That's it..

So there's only one treatment.. Assuming that the tumor isn't taking half of his brain already (and there's a very high risk it has) , the only treatment is removal of both eyes.

Plop.. =/

I hate onchology...

Average life expectancy : 2 years

Draaaaaaaaama

No we did not adopt a sheep at the GITR offices.

Drama seems to be in the air this season , personally i'm more of a horror/comedy (not romantic) kinda guy. Drama is just... too dramatic >.>

Shit is happening around me and its hilarious to see everyone going nuts. Its like the whole world is going to hell. Maybe i had my eyes closed for a while , but now i'm seeing things that i didn't notice before (one of those HOLY SHIT! , moments)

Chaos is everywhere , and i don't know what exactly triggered this (maybe the earthquakes?! ) , but its kinda creepy. Right now i'm supposed to be "taking sides" , or judging what's "right or wrong" . Is there such a thing? . Lately i'm thinking that there's only actions , and each one of em comes with pro's and con's . I'm done trying to take the moral high ground , too much trouble defending my own flawed ideals and morals.

You know what? , problems more often arise when we try to avoid the consequences for our actions. That i learned. The hard way T_T . So i'm done making expectations for my future . Its never going to turn out exactly how i want it to , so what's the point? (this week has CERTAINLY proved it ) . That doesn't mean i wont have goals or ambitions , but they won't be the center of my life . I'm just gonna enjoy the ride for as long as it lasts , with all the ups and downs. With all the tragedies and happy moments. Can't have one without the other.

"Life is not about suffering , but you will suffer it rather than enjoy it until you let go, and just go along for the ride. "

Hellmonth/or simply HELL , is coming soon . Won't have much time for anything. It's going to be long , exhausting and hard. Just like it always is , just as i have come to expect it. So here we go once again. Shit happens. But so does the good stuff.

As for the shitstorm going around. I'm gonna grab my beach chair and sit down with a gigantic bucket of popcorn . Its going to be one hell of a show. @_________________@ . Hopefully there will be fireworks at the end! . I love those =P . Hell , its not like i don't have my own stuff to worry about =/ , you know what i mean.

So that's about it folks... i don't think ill be posting much until its all over , but you never know. Do you? . Good luck all with your own biz , and remember ,

LET THE GMAN SHIIIINE ON YOUR HEARTS!
*fireworks in the background*

@_@ Grade Day @_@

Dear god of grades , i thank thee for your kindness this semester. I know you and i have had our share of disagreements the last two semesters (specially the last one , you S.O.B >_<) but i'm glad we are finally working out our problems.

After all that has happened the past couple of months , this is one of my best semesters, considering that this is considered one of the hardest semesters , the 11th semester. (not that anyone says that 12th is a walk on the park ) .

The 1/2 results are in.

3 A's , 2 B's , 1 C and 1 D - 2 subjects are still not published, but i expect A's or B's- - (fucking hematology >___________< ) . The race is not over yet though! , and the last half is going to be hell, but i will not falter! .

As to why i got a D in Hematology ... well , let's just say its one of those "impossible" classes. I studied a lot , i know the subject well , but it's impossible for me to do well if the teacher tells me to study from X place and gets the question out of Y .

Anyways , i'm not particularly worried about the subject. The highest grade in the class was a C (a very LUCKY c) , and pretty much everyone has a D. I have never heard of anyone getting A with this teacher. It's that hard. One of my partners asked the teacher for a curve and she told her , and i quote , " Oh don't worry... i don't give curves , but no one has ever failed my subject , my calculator always adds up to 70" .

So there you go.

Au contraire to my last 2 semester , its good NOT to be in the danger zone (a relative danger zone i guess, considering i almost got an A in one of the subjects , and in the other one the teacher simply hated me - she actually quit the job after a coup we staged >_> ) . Too much stress, too many sleepless nights.

Well that's it for today peeps. Good luck with your own stuff. Bai! .

I take it back.

January 25th is not the worst day ever. It's today. March 1st 2010.

If its true that the universe works in "mysterious" ways... I hope its already working.

Take care my friend...

The Shape of Things to Come.

Hi folks , what's up? .

It's going to be one hell of a busy month for me. I got a shit load of things to come , and little to no time. That's okay i guess , this is after all the hardest semester in my career, after this , i will know if i really got the stuff in me.

Potential killers this semester :

Hematology .

This class could have been awesome. This class could have shown me Hematology was indeed cool. Now i'm not so sure... Have you ever met one of those persons who speak in a single , unchanging , tone? . Well , this woman is like that. I swear , she never raises or lowers her tone... its kinda freaky actually. I also wondered if she had some kind of paralysis because she doesn't move an INCH for 4 hours straigtht. On the pro-side of things she really knows her stuff and has a "chiva de vieja" .



Ophthalmology


This guy practically wants us to become Ophtalmologists in 4 months. Seriously , i need to study 100+ pages for monday , not only that but i need to MEMORIZE it cause apparently he's also a bastard in tests. Damn B.F.B >_> . Anyways its kinda funny actually. He wrote a book and sent it to us , and even though we study with HIS book , he constantly tells us "you are wrong, where did you read that crap?" . Ironic...

Apparently , the most important thing i need to do to not-fail is participate.. which is pretty hard since his questions are pretty random... lately i noticed some of my friends have had godlike accuracy answering his questions. Turns out they sneaked into an earlier class and wrote the answers for each question =//////

Damn clever bastards >_< .

Rheumatology

Never heard of this subject have you? , not surprised. I have taken 6 classes and i'm still pretty clueless about what the fuck this subject is about... its like they took the weirdest shit ever , the weirdest syndromes and the weirdests symptoms and grouped together and decided to add some random name =/ .


According to the popular definition , this "specialty" treats joint diseases such as arthritis and similar shit.... but wait , they are also supposed to treat LUPUS , Vasculitis and other totally random shit which have nothing in common... anyone care to make a connection between Lupus , Arthritis and Wegener's Granulomatosis? .. Here's a hint : NONE

According to wikipedia : " The term rheumatology originates from the Greek word rheuma, meaning "that which flows as a river or stream," and the suffix -ology, meaning "the study of."

Oh wow... just WTF worthy... anyways the good side is that my teacher is arguably the smartest man i have ever met. Its kinda freaky actually . I wouldn't call him a genius , he's more like the result of an experiment gone wrong. We were actually debating if he had Asperger's or something like that... Honestly? , he looks more like a ROMINO player , rather than a brilliant doctor. Further prove that Wisdom is everywhere, even in the weirdest places...

Anyways , i like weird stuff... and i gotta say this one is calling my attention a lot. We'll see after the test.

Anesthesiology

I don't think this subject is THAT hard.. its just that the teacher is a complete wacko. He makes the weirdest exams ever . 2 days after the test i got told that if i thought a question was "wrong" , i needed to write something like "this is wrong" , or i would lose the point . Yeah... i know.. MOFO!

>_<

Dermatology

I didn't read ONE page before the exam. I was too busy with other shit and i honestly hate this subject. So , trusting my 20/20 i went with my mind in blank . That bastard "smelled" my intentions and moved me to DESERT ISLAND (READ : That chair next to no one >_<) .. lucky for me i think i did well enough. Urology

The devil. The teacher is a kid with his ego still in the stratosphere. He has NEVER given an A to anyone , offers C for free in the final test. Yeah , this one is most likely going to be a C T_T.

....

So that's about it for this semester.. i have lots of things in my mind right now , i'm trying my best not to think too much .. but it gets hard at times , i admit. Anyways , thats it for today folks. Good luck with your own problems =) .

Change. Nothing ever stays the same.

The Fool on The Hiil.

I was a fool.

Broke my own rules.

Now i can laugh and watch the view from the top of the hill.

Watch the sun going down.

Paradox , Humour and Change.

Never make someone your priority if they only have you as an option.

Remember that okay? .

Good luck peeps =D .

I'm sorry.

I would like to apologize to my friends . I'm sorry that sometimes i took you guys for granted , and that i don't appreciate you guys enough. I'm sorry for not realizing sooner how much you guys cared for me . I'm sorry.

I would like to apologize to my family. I'm sorry that i don't invest enough time with you guys , i'm sorry that i can't hold my patience with you guys.. i'll try harder. I'm sorry for the bad things i have said and thought about you guys.. and thank you.. Thank you for being my family.

As for you... I'm sorry ...but there will be no apologies today for you. Except that one.

=/

My puzzling sad/true story. Part 1 .

It all started.


BEGINNNING


---1

---2

---3

END?

Third Eye Blind

3 months ago i wrote to you about something i did (or was about to do) .

Something that took a lot of courage , a lot of luck , and most importantly a lot of faith. I got myself into one of the most hard situations, i have ever been in my life. I took a huge gamble , and i'm here to say , 3 months later , that it has thankfully paid off =) .

I don't know where life will take me. I don't know what will happen with us next month , next week , or even tomorrow. I don't know. I can't know. What i CAN tell you mate, is that i absolutely adore you (aaaaaand this is where i blush - i can do it too~!-) . You are one of the most awesome persons i know (don't brag about this >_>) , and also my best friend. I don't regret the decision i made 3 months ago . In fact , i regret not thinking about it sooner..

I know there has been some rough patches ( minor stuff , that we ,for some reason or another , made a big deal out of nothing >_>) . I don' think its going to be easy , but i have lot of faith in us , and that our relationship will continue to grow. I'm rarely this optimistic and i truly hope you feel the same way.

TQM freckles =) , i hope you enjoyed this last 3 months as much as i did.